My Achilles Heel

English is beautiful and expressive. The alphabet is nice and streamlined. The vocabulary collects words from multiple cultures and nations. (Yes, I'm biased. It's my native language.)

I love reading. I love writing stories that work with English grammar and rhythm. I HATE English spelling.

I was born to English speaking parents, in an English speaking culture. That is the only reason I have half a hope on spelling anything longer than three letters (English language learners, you have my highest respect).

Grade school was an nightmare. I had A's in grammar and reading - C's and low B's in spelling. Mom tried everything - phonetic rules, flashcards, repetition drills. I could read a printed word, sound it out; but ask me to spell 'Wednesday' or 'money'... well, I broke the homeschooler spelling bee stereotype, soundly.

Surprising, I'm not dyslexic. My bad spelling is product of living in the Midwest U.S.A. and mental laziness.

I grew up at a crossroads zone. Texas drawl, Ozark twang, Southern lilt, Mexican and Asian accents – I've heard “Pecan” spoken four different ways at one family reunion. Phonetics are more like guidelines out here.

My own accent switches, depending on the people and situation. (That's another other blog post right there.) Is it any wonder I can't just sound it out or look up the word in the dictionary? Start adding those lovely foreign words like 'faux' and 'sayonara', I'm done - Game Over. I'll write down something that makes sense at that moment.

Luckily, I was born in the early area of spellchecker and autocorrect. It didn't save my report card, but it was a HUGE help in college. I could focus on putting my ideas/notes on paper and then polish the draft in a word document.

My poor spelling sense is here to stay. I have a few hundred common words memorized and for the rest I just do my best. Does it make it hard for people to take my draft works seriously? Yes. Is it going to stop me writing? No, I view it as talking with a lisp. It's a problem only if people are being uptight.

I love storytelling more than I hate working around my weakness in English spelling. 

Overthinking: Names

The human co-protagonist in Tales of Mundus, Leon, has been part of my imagination since 2003. He originally had a long and complicated fantasy name, but nobody but Dad and I could pronounce it right. Picking a new name should have been simple...

...of course I over-thought the whole process.

In genre fiction, names are a two edged sword. It cues the reader into the world type. Gandalf the Grey is a title as much as a name. It fits in a world of descriptive names and foreign languages. Mundus is not high fantasy – I needed something a bit more causal.

On the other hand, I didn't want a diminutive like Tim, Will, etc. or worse something that could turn into a nickname. Timmy the wizard sounds like a preteen boy running wild around the castle with the royal children. That just wouldn't do.

I also didn't want a name that symbolized something weird. Every name has roots in real words. Loren comes from Lorene which tracks back to the Latin word for the laurel tree. There's also cultural baggage with names. Consider about the surname Lear. Most of my generation will either think about King Lear from the play or Learjet the airplane makers.

All this factoids and names requirements made quite the mess out of my notes. For a while, Leon didn't have a 'name.' I just thought of him as wizard-who-needs-a-new-name. (It was very awkward to talk about my projects during those days.)

Finally, I went with my gut and used my dad's middle name, Leon. Surprising, it passed all my tests. Leon is not overly common or formal. It's suitable for a grown man in most cultures. If you break it down it's either a translation of 'lion' or a variant of of Leonidas. (I only though about the Greek version because of all the legends I read.)

Most importantly, people can pronounce it right.

Reading Ruined my Attention Span

My parents are to blame. (Yes, it's a cliched story opening, but it's often true.)

After I outgrew Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood and The Magic School Bus, they did the unthinkable. They unplugged all network T.V. If it wasn't on V.H.S., I didn't get to watch it.

Since computer and video games were just hitting the markets, we turned to books. The few exceptions were spelling and math learning software. It wasn't until I turned 13 that I got a Gameboy. However, the damage was done.

By junior high, I had been reading at a high-school level for a couple of years. It wasn't speed reading or skimming either. Fiction/prose is an information dense style. If you skip the middle bit of a paragraph the dialog doesn't make sense.

Mom and Dad's evil plot was working – I had an intense focus ability and enjoyed in depth narratives.

Soon, I went to college and rediscovered commercial television.

…I was not impressed.

Movies weren't too bad, because they were continuous and didn't clutter my memory with jingles and product slogans. (I was taking Engineering prerequisites – free brain space was at a premium) Drama series didn't make the cut.

Plot twists were telegraphed and everything was stuck to the speed of dialogue. Yes, I was reading faster than most people speak.

This made the News unbearable. The President's hour-and-a-half State of the Union speech could be printed, read, and mentally digested in twenty minutes. Why should I watch a guy stand and wave his index finger around when I had stuff to do?

College lectures were my one exception to 'just read the summary or original source.' I attended class to learn the grader's vocabulary and thought structure so I could mimic it for my papers. (Tip for students: If the tone of your essay is close to their 'tone,' you get better grades.)

Studies aside, this 'blah' effect on media sent me back to books. My reading speed increased again. Books and web publications were cheaper to marathon than boxed sets of Lost. The cycle continued.

It wasn't until I was in my mid-twenties that I realized what my parents had done to me. They counter-brainwashed me into preferring information dense media. Even books made into movies are flashy eye candy. All special effects and no depth of world.

Reading is a double edged sword. It chances the way you think and process. Your values and expectations of entertainment also shift. I just don't enjoy T.V.

...I told Mom about this article. She grinned, self-satisfied.

Do Centaurs Wear Horseshoes?

While fiction depends on "it's make-believe," I can't turn off over ten-years of education and critical thinking. This shows in my writing.

Mundus is a fantasy world with European fairytale elements – wizards, dragons, gingerbread houses. However, I'm a bit of a cultural magpie. If something catches my fancy, I'll grab it.

Centaurs are part of mainstream fantasy due to works like The Chronicles of Narnia and Percy Jackson and the Olympians. Centaurs are a visually stunning icon - fast, free, and dangerous in battle.

Of course, my brain had to go and ruin a perfectly good action sequence. Would centaurs need to wear horseshoes? If Mundus was to have centaurs, I needed answers.

Oddly enough, I did not just Google 'do centaurs wear horseshoes.' It actually didn't occur to me to check until I started working on this blog. I used an insane combination of anthropology, veterinarian knowledge, and gut-feeling.

Simple answer. Yes, centaurs could wear horseshoes. They'd probable even pioneer the concept.

Now, I've seen some web articles arguing that centaurs would avoid horseshoes. A noble race that denies the traps of industrialization. Yeah, I call horse hockey. Assuming they have human-ish brains, centaurs would use tools. They need them.

You see, horses eat raw greenery – no tools or thumbs needed. Ever think that Centaurs might not be strict vegan foragers? Human diets are tricky, and even a raw food diet isn't a simple matter. However, humans have the advantage of having omnivore feet. Hooves are for running away - not stalking, climbing, tumbling, or swimming.

If centaurs want to evolve past wandering from meal to meal, they need to protect their feet. They have thumbs, brains, and a 'herd' support group. Tools and other technology are the natural outcomes.

Hoof picks, rasps, and files would start in wood and stone. While centaurs probably don't mine ore, they would definitely pick up metal from other races. From there, it's a matter of time until some genius or drunk idiot gets a friend to nail traction plates on his/her hooves.

In the real world, there is a large debate on the long-term health of shod versus barefoot horses. Joint health, bad maintenance, disease prevention, local terrain, back and forth they go. However, it's humans doing the arguing and medical studies – not the actual shoe wearers.

Centaurs would only bother with horseshoes if it gave them an advantage. A nomadic hunter on the plains might not see the need for the extra work. However, a farmer working on rocky or abrasive ground could save him or herself a cracked hoof. Shoe types could be refined because the wearer can talk about what they need.

Ta-da, centaurs designing and wearing horseshoes.

I have an answer and an argument that would make a d20 player weep. However, the real fun is in the 'story seeds' I found while researching.

1. The first shoe fitting and failed prototypes
2. Centaur lifestyles that require shoes – city dwellers, ranchers, military
3. Commercial hoof salons (think ladies' night out and glittery polish)

Sometimes the long way is the better way.